Where are you?

I see you standing there. But it's like you are not there. You are here. But you are not here. What happened? Where have you gone? I miss your smile in the mornings and your phone calls at night. What happened? Have I done something wrong? I want you back, not this person standing in your place. I want for you to want to be here. Not wish you were anywhere but. What happened? Will you ever be back?

Monday Fundays

So my two little cherubs started day care yesterday. They are going to be going every Monday. Which means Mondays are now going to be MY day. So, they are going to be my Fun Day. The day I do whatever the hell I want to do without worrying about everyone else. 

 These days are going to be filled with watching the girly movies and tv series which Aaron refuses to watch with me. Scrapbooking. Shopping. Beading and doing my hair, waxing, tinting, dyeing (sp?) and nails. And catch up with friends.

    

So here is to Monday Fundays. The days where I regain my sanity. Miss my babies like crazy. But think of no-one but myself.

Hit the nail on the head

Isn't if funny how sometimes we don't realise thing until they are pointed out to us, even though they are staring us right in the face. Saying Hello, look, I'm here. Helllllllllloooooooooooooooooooo.

This afternoon I was ironing, seriously for the first time ever. (I'm lucky that my MIL insists on doing it for us. But she is sick at the moment). Anyway, my darling hubby came and said "Netty what demon has possessed you?". In other words, "why the hell are you ironing when you hate it so much". I just felt like it.


Since the new year my house has been 10 times cleaner then it usually is. I am washing and vacumning the floor every night, scrubbing windows, mowing lawns, and today.. ironing.

Usually I am not a very domestic person. Aaron pointed out this afternoon that it is because I don't want to be like my Mother.

My whole life all my Mother ever did was clean the house and look after the kids. It was her job. Her life. All she had. She would be cleaning all day every day until she went to bed. And later in life it's all she complains about. That all her life she had to clean everything and she's done her fair share. She has so much regret for her past because she never had anything for herself but cleaning and looking after us kids.

Aaron delightfully pointed out today that I hate cleaning so much because I don't want to be miserable like my Mother was. I am afraid that I will turn out all bitter and resentful if all I do is clean and look after the kids.

He hit the nail on the head. I never really realised that until he said it. I am afraid I will be miserable and regret my life.

And then I realised I have something my Mother didn't have. A loving supportive husband who couldn't give a shit if he came home to a spotless house or a house with toys scattered all over the place, a dirty floor and pile of dishes still in the sink.

I am more then a cleaner and mother. I am me. I am Annette.

So, now to find some things for me to do for me. 

Clean clean clean

How awesome does it feel to clean your house from top to bottom, then look back and feel that sense of accomplishment. Such a shame it only lasts till the kids get home.

 Alyssa and Alex have spent the afternoon/night at Nan and Pops so I really got stuck into the housework. It looks great for a change. I even reorganised my craft desk and cleaned off the mountain of junk from the pool table. And I decided to write a roster. Designated chores for certain days. Lets see how long I stick to it for. Would be fantastic if I could. It's good to stay on top of the cleaning. I find having a clean decluttered house makes me feel better. Having the house a mess literally makes me feel depressed.

Aaron told me that is has been scientifically proven that mentally ill people feel better if they are in a clean/tidy environment. Perhaps he thinks I am nutty?

So... here is to my clean, decluttered, tidy house! Until the kids gets home!

The beginning

So I thought it was about time I started a blog. Why? No reason really. Does 'because i can' count? Everyone else seems to be doing it so I am jumping on the band wagon.

So... it's the beginning of a new year. 2011. I wonder what lies ahead this year. Hopefully not as much excitement as last year. A nice quiet year would be nice... let's just see what happens eh.